I'm not really sure where to start. I've put everything I have into us, and for 7 months you have been my everything. For 7 months I have been in love with you. For 7 months you have been my main priority. My best friend. That's not going to change no matter what happens and no matter how anything turns out. You have always been there for me and I have done my best to be there for you. I feel like I am losing a battle that I'm not sure I can handle losing. It's tough, I guess, to be perfect. And in no way am I even desperately close to that. I messed up, and I regret it every single day. But the thing is, no matter how imperfect I was, you made me want to be perfect. Because you deserve nothing less than the best, and I wanted to be the best. That Tuesday night of Homecoming was the best night of my life, because I was with you. To be honest, every moment we've spent together has been amazing. Whether we were driving alone and talking or hanging out with everyone else. Everything was right and I want everything to be right between us. These last couple weeks have been confusing and I'll be honest, I'm scared. I've been scared. Knowing what you had been through previously tore me apart inside and I swore to myself I would not do that to you. If I ever hurt you like that, I couldn't live with myself. So maybe that was my problem. Maybe I was too scared of failure to find success. I was scared of looking stupid. I'm scared of everything we have just crumbling away, and I can't handle that fear. I'm who I am because you have helped me find myself, and I can't thank you enough for that. I don't want to know who I would've become without you. I actually care about myself for once. I actually feel like someone cares about me now, and that person is you. I can embrace who I am because you showed me that was okay. With you, I don't want there to be an end. I want to go on forever in this dream. This dream is the best dream I've ever had, and waking up will only return me to the nightmare I was lost in before meeting you. You are my best friend, through thick and thin, through dark and light. Nothing is ever going to change what you are to me and no one is ever going to replace you in my life and heart.
I Love You, I'm in Love with You, and nothing is changing in our friendship. I won't let that happen. Ever.
-Conrad
